X Factor 4 – A Totally Modal Yodeller Ogler

Well, airbrush me from X Factor history and call me Tulisa. X Factor.

Straight to it.

Shelley: The new Justin Lee Collins. Where to does that voice come from?

Jade: Doing an impression of Adele singing Amy Winehouse. Amy would be livid. The judges thought she didn’t connect with the audience, but that may be because she has the personality of a sideboard.

Dolly Rockers: Good. If you like sixth form reviews. Booted off. Lots of tears. Mascara slick holds up proceedings.

Melanie: Sang ‘Bulletproof’, made famous by ginger misery La Roux.

Tom the football coach: Sang with the passion of a Dyson upright. Four yeses.

Barclay : Oddally doddally aydally bod dilly yes.

Skank Hair: Still missed his name.  Shouted. Went through. Mobbed by head lice.

Euphoria Girls: Stank the place out more than skank head. Awful band. Naturally, Louis loved them. Booted.

“Fair play, that one’s fit,” commented Master Johnny. That’s alright then.

Relly: Nearly blew it. My tip for overall winner probably didn’t help. Maybe she shouldn’t follow my blog so avidly.

Abi: Looks like Nana Mouskouri. Sounds like Ellie Gould. Little girl looks win through, but may drown kittens for a hobby. Allegedly.

Until next week. If I can be arsed.



About ruralspaceman

A man trapped inside a middle aged body still tries to be hip and trendy. Actually, no he doesn't. He says it as he sees it. as long as it's not too controversial. Living with his wife, Lady Barton St Mary, two children, Miss Katherine and Master Johnny in Randall Towers, he is constantly frustrated by the mechanisms of modern life and the issues raised by being the husband of a high flying executive and member of the aristocracy. All he wants is a quiet life and a full set of Deal or No Deal DVDs. Please help him.
This entry was posted in blog, blogging, blogs, comedy, comic characters, freshly pressed, gary barlow, humor, humour, life observations, linguistics, louis walsh, Nicole Scherzinger, relationships, sharon Osbourne, simon cowell, wordpress, x factor and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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